Two out of Three Ain't Bad

So a few months ago, Meatloaf came out with Bat out of Hell III. I don't think it has quite the grandeur or creativity as I and II, but like Meatloaf sang in the first Bat out of Hell album, "two out of three ain't bad."

In I, the world was introduced to Wagnerian Rock, composer / songwriter Jim Steinman's mix of rock and opera in epic excess.

But while known best for the excess of the title track, Bat out of Hell III wasn't just about excess. It was also about campy teenage love (Paradise by the Dashboard Lights) and lost romance (Two out of Three Ain't Bad). The lyrics sometimes bordered on the ridiculously overblown, and that was part of the charm. Basically, if you like simple melodies, you will never like a Jim Steinman song. But if you don't take things too seriously and just want to enjoy the camp, then it's great.

Bat out of Hell II - actually produced by Steinman this time- and coming more than 10 years after Bat out of Hell- was even more excessive than Bat out of Hell. Bat out of Hell featured 3 songs clocking over 7 minutes. Well, Bat out of Hell II featured 6 songs longer than 7 minutes. Those songs featured long and weird titles like, "I Would Do Anything for Love (but I Won't Do That)," "Life is a Lemon and I Want My Money Back," and "Objects in the Rearview Mirror May Appear Closer than They Are." Some of the lyrics were so ridiculous that you'd just have to laugh. For instance, there's:

"What about your childhood?
Its defective!
Its dead and buried in the past"

which doesn't seem too strange. A bit excessive, but fairly normal. But it's followed by:

"What about your future?
Its defective!
And you can shove it up your ass!!"

What the... I mean what .... there's *no* transition there.

Now after another hiatus of ten-odd years, we have Bat out of Hell III, where some of the songs were written by Jim Steinman, but where he's otherwise been almost uninvolved. And when you're missing Jim Steinman's touch, you just don't have a great Meatloaf. Meatloaf's voice has held up well over the years. The songs are still bombastic and excessive, but somehow, the thrill is gone, and I'm afraid we can't take it back.

The signature songs on this album are "The Monster is Loose," which is kind of metal-y. It isn't *bad* but it doesn't quite add anything to the Meatloaf canon. He already sung the ultimate epic with "Bat out of Hell," and he already sung the ultimate long and overdrawn but seemingly not dragging out love ballad with "I Would Do Anything for Love," and he's already sung a hard-rock Meatloaf in "Life is a Lemon and I Want My Money Back," so what was the point of "The Monster is Loose?"

So Meatloaf tries his hand at a love duet, which traditionally he's been quite good at, "It's All Coming Back to Me Now." Now I probably won't say this for any other song, but Celine Dion already did the definitive rendition for that like 10 years ago. Meatloaf's version is actually *not* excessive enough. It's actually kind of quiet. And his duet partner's role is basically to echo him, rather than contributing significant verses on her own. Meatloaf's best duet was in "Paradise by the Dashboard Lights." Even though the two singers certainly sound much older than teenagers, they push off 70's drive-in teen angst very well, and the transition from professions of love to can't stand the hell out of each other is quite convincing.

All in all, still a very listenable album- that is, if you're into Wagnerian rock. Meatloaf has the balls to sing and Jim Steinman has the balls to write lyrics that are so absurd that only someone with straight out moxy can, such as "Your love is blind- blind as a bat!" And I think that's gotta count for something. Better than the endless verses ending in "hold me tight" with most other pop songs. And there's something much more fun about the emotional overwroughtness of Wagnerian Rock, which is even more overblown than most 80s power ballads, as opposed to the empty mechanical songs that usually get cranked out now, where the singer has no conviction.